Disclaimer: Blogs are a great place to get helpful information but they should never replace mental healthcare and this blog is no exception. These blog posts do not replace mental heath care and is not medical advice.

We have many reasons for staying in a stressful or unhealthy work environment and sometimes what makes our jobs stressful is out of anyone’s control and comes with the territory (like first responders, for example). But what if you’re the leader? Are there things you can do to create a healthy workplace? 

Absolutely! 

Leaders, bosses, managers, whatever you want to call yourself - you have authority over others and YOU determine the culture of the workplace. Over the years I’ve watched bosses who are great and those who are horrible and after leading a team myself, here’s what I’ve learned:

Typically, bosses who are horrible have no business leading people. That may sound harsh but it’s just the truth. Maybe they were a great nurse or a great salesperson or maybe they were a great psychologists and because of their success in their roles they were promoted or afforded the opportunity to lead. As a business psychologist I cringe at the thought that this is how people become leaders of people. 

Leading people takes much more than just being good at the job you’re leading others to do; it takes strong people skills but also strong self-reflection and self-correction skills. In my experience, most horrible bosses are too proud to self-reflect on what they did to cause an error. 

When I first started leading a team I made many mistakes in communication during the pandemic and learned quickly that I needed to humble myself and self-reflect. I learned quickly and adapted, whenever there was a mistake made on my team’s part I reflected on my role in the situation.

I thought about:

Did I communicate expectations clearly? Did I train the person properly? Is there a policy on this and was it clearly communicated to the team? Have I been a good example? 

Typically, bad leaders don’t ask themselves these questions and whatsmore is if they do ask themselves these questions, they don’t then take the steps to remedy the situation in a prosocial way. 

What I mean by this is, they typically will try to handle a situation by solving it themselves or with a very small team (maybe a manager) and do a poor job of communicating to the rest of the team until the situation is “resolved” in their eyes.

In contrast, what a good leader does is:

1. Self-reflection & Communication

After self-reflection they communicate with their team what their part in the error was. This is a crucial step because it shows the team that the leader knows he/she has faults and is humble enough to admit when they’ve made a mistake. 

This subconsciously encourages the team to do the same when they make a mistake - making problem-solving much easier when future mistakes are made. However, this step is often skipped by horrible bosses due to fear of embarrassment or pride.

2. Communicate Prevention Ideas

Next, they communicate their thoughts on how to prevent this situation going forward. Maybe they need to create a policy and make sure it’s clearly communicated to the team and part of the on-boarding process. 

Maybe they need to restructure the on-boarding training. Maybe they were participating in behaviors that led to the mistake and they will work on behavioral change on their part. Whatever the proposed solution, the leader communicates it.

3. Collaboration

To take it one step further, a good manager also asks for suggestions from the team on how to prevent this error again. Listening to others opens the door for creative problem-solving. Horrible bosses forget that the members on their teams have unique experiences and may have suggestions that haven’t been thought of.

4. Good leaders remember that mistakes don’t equal incompetence.

If a mistake was made that there is a policy on and it was part of training or onboarding, the leader does not assume that the person/people who made the mistake did it maliciously or out of incompetence. After-all, if their staff is indeed incompetent, whose fault is that?

Instead, a good leader talks to those people or that person individually to determine what went wrong. It is important to note that a good leader speaks to this person as a collaborator to problem-solving not as an interrogator. Maybe they forgot the policy so a training refresher is needed as part of the education process on the team. 

Or, what I’ve seen more often, the policy doesn’t make sense or is unrealistic to the team so most don’t follow it and most don’t get caught not following it. This is a more complicated issue and requires more research on what about the policy is unrealistic and how it can be made more manageable or realistic.

I want to point out that I’m not suggesting that disciplinary action not be taken but I am suggesting that before dishing out discipline, do a thorough search of your workplace and your behaviors to determine how you contributed to the error. And then discipline yourself as well.

How do I discipline myself, you ask? Simple,

I mentioned earlier that many horrible bosses don’t self-reflect and communicate well. To me, the best form of discipline for a boss is taking that embarrassing step to tell your staff what you did wrong in this situation and the steps YOU’RE taking to prevent it from happening again. 

Like I said, simple. 

So why don’t more bosses do this? Pride, fear of embarrassment, or maybe they also have a horrible boss who would abuse them for making a mistake. That’s what makes this a disciplinary step on the boss’ part. It’s a difficult and sometimes painful step but the long-lasting result is a positive change in the culture.

If you’ve read this post and you’re thinking ‘this is all too simple’ or ‘she doesn’t know what she’s talking about.’ First, yes, it is simple but simple does not mean easy. 

Second, I know from personal experience that pride makes your staff miserable and makes your job harder. After doing some self-reflection and changing the way I handled mistakes, rapport on my team was better, mistakes were caught early because people felt comfortable being honest, and the same mistake never happened twice. 

When I announced to my team that I was leaving the organization they all said I was one of the best bosses they’ve had and were nervous about having a new boss. They even organized a dinner and gave me thank you gifts.

That’s the best compliment you can receive before leaving a role - that you were one of the best.

I hope you take these tips to heart and avoid some of the mistakes I made as a leader. If you would like a leadership or career consultation, contact me to schedule an appointment.

Wishing you the best,

Carmelita